IC Inbox: cerealia

[shacklebreaker]

"You've reached Simon Blackquill. Leave a message if you are so inclined -- but be brief."

[ AUDIO | VIDEO | TEXT ]

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[Text] And now for something completely different...

[fairbrook]

Mr. Blackquill, I require your assistance. There is a matter of utmost urgency.

[Text]

[shacklebreaker]

What is it, Sir Hellsing?

[Text]

[fairbrook]

[She forwards him this message.]

A series of vaguely threatening chain letters. I've managed to trace the sender.

[What a buzzkill...]

[Text]

[shacklebreaker]

I received the same message, but brushed it off as nothing more than a childish prank. [... And he might have sent back threats of his own. Whoops?]

Who is the sender? Do you have reason to believe such threats could be serious?

[fairbrook]

One Xerxes Break. Personally, I do not consider it a threat myself, but we are to treat it as if it were. Protocol, you see.

[Basically: she's a stickler for protocol.]

[shacklebreaker]

Then with all due respect, you should know that protocol dictates I am not qualified to help you.

[So salty about not being a prosecutor here. SO SALTY.]